I slip them on then get a room. It’s a basic double room, nothing special, but at least I am alone and safe. I strip and slide into the bed and clos... my eyes. Tears start to flow again and I just lay there.The next thing I know is the sun in my eyes through the open curtains. I get up and shut them, blocking out the light. On my way back to the bed I grab my phone from my bag. Twenty-three missed calls. Thirty-four text messages. Twelve voice-mails.I start with the voice-mails. They are all. You do not need my permission for anything. Let me unclip your hands, and then remove your collar and cuffs.”I surprised myself by feeling tears come to my eyes. “Please, let me keep them on,” I said in a small voice.He put a finger under my chin, “Believe me, I want to. But today is a make or break day. Will you trust me when I say that you need to be Dr. Rabinovich this morning, and not my favorite fucktoy?”I looked at him, then nodded. “If I can trust you with my body and my life, I will. Then it spread to my face. I reached for my mirror. Theone in my purse. It was shocking but it felt natural to look at themirror. I just had to make sure my makeup was good. I paused. My face wascovered in makeup, eye liner, eye shadow, powder, and lipstick. It feltso right but look so wrong. I look like a drag queen.Then a notice the voice. It was a small voice. Something whispering fromthe darkest corners of my mind. It was saying a few simple words. Justtwo words. Give in. It seems to come. I called Mom to let her know and Eric assured her that he would drive me home when we were done. Since Eric graduated with my oldest brother our families knew each other, so it was no big deal. So off we went full speed across the lake. Eric still in his short shorts and blonde hair blowing and Shaun sitting up front I parked myself right next to Eric. Giving that crotch a glance every now and then. Had to be careful, didn’t want to get my skinny ass kicked. We finally got to the other side and.
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